Fast & Fabulous

Fancy Fast Food

Still bad... but look how good it looks!

Shoulder to shoulder

Balmain-esque shoulders: is there a more covetable look for Autumn? The trend is pouring downstream, popping up everywhere in jackets and statement dresses. Penney's are about to launch their 'Power Shoulder Blazer', which should sell out in seconds and Dorothy Perkins is even sporting the look in military form with a cosy red coat that means serious winter business.

DP is also home to a black/grey statement shoulder dress that wouldn't look out of place on the Starship Enterprise, but screw it, I'm happy to take my cue from space if it guarantees the death of neon body-con by September.

By the way, 'shoulder' is one of those words that starts to lose all meaning once you type it or say it three or four times.


Power shoulder blazer €25, Penney's (due in store in August)



Puff shoulder crepe dress, €21, Penney's (due in store mid-October)





Red military coat €150, Dorothy Perkins




Statement shoulder dress, €50, Dorothy Perkins

Introducing...

When it comes to babies, I like them but I couldn't eat a whole one. That's why I'm super psyched and honoured to have been crowned fairy godmother to my best friend's shiny new son. Are you ready? Hold onto your biological clocks ladies, and behold the hotness that is Luke:

I have layers.

When you're looking at this photo, imagine you are my next door neighbour, peeping through a hole in the wall, probably massively turned on by goings-on chez Pedestrian.

Fun, no?

Not that my neighbour's a sex pest or anything. He's actually quite a nice man called Pat. He has a bird feeder, which he refills regularly with proper bird seed you get from the garden centre. Not just bits of old toast and gone-off cereal, like I give them.

Aaaaanyway.

I've denim-y, zippy layers. Denim layer dress, €19, Penney's.

Beware of bunching

Gah - bunching, even the word is gross. Playsuits are fabulous, but why in the name of Farrah Fawcett are people not trying them on before wearing them outside? It's like the opposite of camel toe and it's everywhere - awkward bunching in the playsuit crotch region.

Look in the mirror bitches!

Look in the mirror!

Michael Jackson (1958-2009)

"I'm just like anyone. I cut and I bleed. And I embarrass easily."
-Michael Jackson

Watch this. It's zingy.

You could have your own city.

Abandoned places

Jimmy Choo for H&M!

Cue frenzy. Jimmy Choo is collaborating with H&M to bring us a range of accessories that will hit stores worldwide this Autumn. The collection, initially featuring shoes and bags, will be extended to include women's clothing.

Further exciting news is that the collaboration includes a men’s collection of shoes, bags and accessories.

“We are privileged to be among the fashion greats who have been affiliated with H&M so far, and to be designing a collection appealing to fashion savvy, street smart women, and to be including some great pieces for men, too. Jimmy Choo will bring to H&M a sophisticated, fashion forward, accessible and glamorous collection – the perfect party pieces to buy now and then wear out that night!” Tamara Mellon, Founder and President, Jimmy Choo.

Prices and availability TBC, but I'd be wiling to travel for the black heels pictured (above), and I'm totally open to mugging the waif in the blue dress (below) for her belt..

Anchors Away!

I'm in the depths of a deeply traumatic wardrobe clear out. The storage capabilities of my two-bedroom mini-house are maxed out and short of filling the oven with shoes or politely asking Mr. Pedestrian to store his clothes in the garden, I have no option but to stop hoarding. There are some items I've only been able to let go of because friends have promised me they'll take good care of them, but what's ace is that, once it's left the house and been carted off to its new life, I don't miss any item one bit.

This could take a while, but it'll be worth it if I can make room for a tonne of new stuff I've been mentally trying on. Stuff with anchors on, to start.

Above: The Red Anchor Charm Bag, €33, Evans.
Below: Navy Anchor Silk Scarf, €12, Next





OR you could bag some cheap anchor charms here and here and get crafty on its ass...